Permission to grow
by Anaëlle Gonzalez (20.05.2022)
I can feel my old skin
Shedding and
Sloughing into something
Unknown and obscure
Yet, ablaze and assured.
The zebra membrane marbles,
Unable to resolve
This ambivalent maze.
Boundaries blur between
Old, current and altered selves.
The ego of distant pasts
Hoards and holds tightly
To the weak certainties
And polished identities.
The time-worn enamel sheds
and sticks to the flayed membrane,
Afraid of dissolution,
Of memory loss and rejection.
The new flesh exposed and unsure
Is half chrysalis, half hatched;
Coerced to come into
But shy to impose its being.
The worn out gives rise to
The young yet older,
Intrinsically part of it,
And still, not completely.
New realities arise and
Insecurities ground them
By fears of forgetting,
Of unrecognized anthems.
What if the old habitat
was better than the new?
What if of all versions,
Only one was true?